Heart Full of Stories by Gowri

I saw one cleaner aunty sweeping the floor and mopping. With a weak voice, I called out to her. “Aunty… I’m going to deliver my baby. The pain is unbearable. Can you please pray for me? Please pray for a smooth delivery…” She came near me and softly said, “Sure, sure… You don’t worry. I will pray for you.” 5.30 p.m. I felt like the baby was about to come out. I could feel her head near my pelvis. I screamed like crazy, “I need help! Help! Help! Nurse! Doctor! Help me!” (When I think back now, I feel like laughing loudly at how I shouted.) Nurses and doctors rushed in. They asked me to push. I tried a few times, but the baby didn’t come out. Then the doctor said, in a firmer voice, “I said 6 p.m. Just wait. After this, no more shouting. Okay?” I felt like crying again. Mmm… 5.50 p.m. Again, I felt the baby’s head near my pelvis. This time, I didn’t shout. I tried to push on my own—but I didn’t know the right way. I just pushed and pushed… A nurse from outside saw me and immediately shou...

  37 Weeks 3 Days Pregnant 10.00am That was when my contraction pain started. It came slowly at first, but after a few minutes, I couldn't bear it. "Ammadiiii!" I turned left and right, trying to find the most comfortable position. The pain came and went. 12.00pm The pain became unbearable. I asked the nurse for a painkiller injection. She said, “No, painkillers can only be given every 6 hours.” Pity me… I just lay there, helpless. 2.00pm I really couldn’t take the pain anymore. I begged the nurse for a C-section. She said she would check with the doctor. I could hear the nurse speaking to the doctor outside.  "Ini hospital bapa dia ke? Dari awal kita minta dia untuk operate, dia tak nak. Sekarang baru nak operate. Operation theatre penuh." The doctor scolded me. Mmmm… The nurse came back into the room and said in a softer voice, “Gowri, ramai yang tengah tunggu turn untuk operate. Tapi kalau Gowri nak, saya boleh bagi painkiller.” I immediately replied, “Yes, p...

  09.02.2024 – 37 Weeks 3 Days As usual, all of us sat in rows for the routine check-up. I didn’t know why, but I had mixed feelings that day. Suddenly, the nurse asked me to lie down on a different bed. When the doctor checked, I was already 4 cm dilated. Then, out of nowhere, she picked up something—later I knew it was an amniohook—and tried to insert it. I was shocked. With a nervous voice, I asked, “Doktor, nak buat apa?” “Saya nak pecahkan air ketuban,” the doctor replied calmly. “Ah doktor, saya takut… Saya tak diberitahu pun pasal ni,” I said, my nervousness peaking. “Jangan risau. Awak takkan rasa sakit pun. Hanya air panas akan keluar. Okey? Boleh kita proceed?” she asked gently. I just nodded. After the procedure, the nurse asked me to sit in a wheelchair. She pushed me back to my bed so I could collect my belongings. I said bye-bye to the friends I had made in the ward. The nurse told me to eat something before going in—I managed a small piece of bread. Around 7.30 a.m.,...

  07.06.2025 – 37 weeks 1 day pregnant Almost every day, nurses will wake all the moms at 5.30am to check dilation. They’ll put a wire on the tummy to monitor baby’s heartbeat and ask us to move our feet left and right if baby is still sleeping. Mine? Still 3cm today. No change. Haih... I asked Guna to visit me in the evening because afternoon visiting time is too short. He said he wanted to bring Amma, but I said no. I didn’t want her climbing up and down stairs—our house is on the 4th floor. So only Guna came. And another person who visited was Yati—my dearest friend and mentor throughout my pregnancy journey. I’m forever grateful for her. It’s not easy to get a friend like that. Love you, Ti. ❤️ 08.06.2025 – 37 weeks 2 days pregnant This morning, the nurse called me to the check-up room again. Still 3cm. Huhuhu… While waiting, a kakak next to me started chatting. It was her fifth delivery! She told me: “Adik, akak ni anak kelima tau. Semua normal delivery. Petuanya minum air kel...

  06.02.2025 (6.00 AM ) 36 weeks, 7 days pregnant As usual, after cooking breakfast and lunch for us, I went to the washroom to get ready for school. I still remember what I cooked that day—keerai curry, sambal tofu, and appalam—because it was Tuesday. When I entered the washroom, I noticed a blood spot on my pants. I immediately went to the bedroom, woke Guna, and told him, “I spotted.” He looked confused. “Let’s go to HSA. It’s time to deliver the baby,” I said. He replied, “No lah, got 3 more weeks!” I said, “Nooo, Dr. Ivin already informed us that the baby has taken position. She’ll come out anytime now!” We rushed to HSA and arrived at 7:15 AM. After a quick check, the doctor informed us that I was already 3 cm dilated. They asked me to change into a hospital sarung, and Guna went to the registration counter. The nurse gave me a bed. Even though both of us are government servants, I didn’t get a Kelas A ward since HSA was under construction. They placed me in a 7-bedded room. ...

Among the many little treasures I’ve kept close over the years, this Sambrani ceramic pot holds a special place in my heart. It was gifted to me by my Kumar bro, sometime around 2021. A simple gift, yet so meaningful. When I got transferred to Johor Bahru , this pot was one of the few things I packed with care and brought along. Not because it’s expensive or grand, but because it carries love. I have this habit—maybe a sentimental one—of keeping every gift from my friends. To me, gifts are not just objects. They are symbols of love, tokens of moments, and reminders of the bonds we share. Kumar bro is someone truly special in my life. More than a friend, he has always treated me like a sister—with kindness, guidance, and a heart full of care. This little pot reminds me of that bond every time I light the Sambrani. Thank you, bro, for this beautiful connection we share. Your gift is not just sitting on a shelf—it’s part of my memories, my warmth, and my story. - GowriArumugam -

  Kalaan Kari: A Taste of Home and Heaven Last night, just before drifting off to sleep, I turned to my husband and asked the golden question: "What to cook for lunch tomorrow?" I had no clue. I just knew I didn’t want the usual—no chicken, no sambar, and definitely not rasam. I craved something different… something comforting. Then, like a little spark from the past, it came to me—"Kalaan kari" (mushroom curry). When I mentioned it to my husband, his eyes lit up. “Okey,” he said with a smile that told me he too had been missing that familiar taste. It wasn’t just any dish. This was a childhood favourite—cooked lovingly by both our mothers. Today, I brought that memory to life. I made kalaan kari with potatoes and a handful of anchovies—just the way our mothers used to. When lunchtime came, baby Kirtigah was asleep. So it was just the two of us, sharing not just a meal, but a quiet moment filled with memories. We spoke about our childhood, our homes, and especially ...